Dog Eat Dog – Weird Al Yankovic

Found a job in a great big office,
And I really love this place
I got my…. my very own scotch tape dispenser,
And I’ve got a private parking space… Ha!
And I… I got my coffee mug with my… with my name right on it
In big bold letters, so everyone knows it’s mine
Don’t even touch it, cause… cause it doesn’t belong to you.
And I’m watchin’ you, so don’t get funny.

I’m climbing up, up the corporate ladder.
Watch out! It’s dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, it feels alright.
Watch Out! It’s dog eat dog.
Here we go.

I love to watch my boss get angry,
So I can count the veins in his neck. Ha!
Everyday is like a picnic,
Every Friday, get a check.

Well, do I smell Jelly donuts? This is my lucky day!
I’ll have some coffee with a carcinogenic sweetener.
Hold on a minute, just one more jelly donut.
They’ll never miss it…. No, they’ll never miss it!

I…. I’m climbing up, up the corporate ladder!
Watch Out! Well, It’s dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, it feels alright.
Watch out, hey! Well, It’s dog eat dog.

Sometimes I can’t believe this is all really happening!
Sometimes I can’t believe that I’m really sitting here!
Sometimes I tell myself, “This is not my beautiful stapler!”
Sometimes I tell myself, “This is not my beautiful chair!”

Lahg-doogie-doggy-dog-dog-dah-aye-yah-yah
Ha! Ha!

Nobody’s sure what I do here,
And ahh, that’s just fine with me.
Five o’clock is here much too soon now,
‘Cause I just never wanna leave.

I can bend paper clips into the shapes of small animals
Maybe I can get on, on David Letterman
I-I-I-I-I think I made a big mistake
Where’s my liquid paper, where’s my liquid paper?

I, I’m climbing up, way up the corporate ladder now
Watch out! Well, It’s dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, it feels alright.
Better be careful now, It’s dog eat dog
Watch me work. Hey, hey, stand back now.
Look out mama! It’s dog eat dog.
Nose against the grindstone, it feels real good.
Hey, dog eat dog.
Here we go.

Doggy Doggy Dog Dog!
It’s dog eat dog!

Say Hi-eye-eye-eye-eye!
Dog eat dog!

Woof woof!
Hey! Heyyyy!
Dog eat dog!

Say Brrrrrr!
Dog eat dog!

Here we go!
Ha!
Dog eat dog!

Bah-dah Bah-dah Ayeeeewww
Dog eat dog!

Nah Nahalah Hi-eye-eye-eye-eye!
Dog eat dog!

Ruff! Ruff!
Dog eat dog, dog eat dog!