[Napoleon:] Sunrise Get up in the mornin’ You know, I think it’s mornin’ Sun is shinin’ bright I’m gonna get outside Gonna wash my face Grab my hat Put it on my head I take a walk downtown Yeah-hey… Because I feel so-oh good I think I’m gonna take a walk downtown Hey! Sunlight! Wo! Somethin’ I never seen before Been a-walkin’ down the street every day Nobody like you ever passed my way Maybe there must be too much sun Couldn’t be my hat, must be too much… Wait a minute! What’s that you…? What’s that? What…? What’s that? What…? What’s that? What…?
[FZ:] Dummy Up
[Napoleon:] What is that? I know what that is, I know what that is… I bet you that’s a restaurant menu… Let me see! Let me see!
[Jeff:] Not only do you get the Desenex burger… not only the Desenex burger… but you are in for a real treat, Jim [Napoleon:] Wait a minute, I think I like that dance better than this… What are you talkin’ about, creep? [Jeff:] What I’m talkin’ about is you’ve been in this killer fog down here too long [Napoleon:] What? [Jeff:] You need somethin’ to get up and go to school with [Napoleon:] Wait a minute, you’re not talkin’ to an old fool now, you know, I wasn’t born yesterday! [FZ:] (Heh heh heh!) [Napoleon:] Wait a minute… I think I’ll take… [Jeff:] I like that little dance you were doin’ down there… [FZ:] Jeff Simmons tries to corrupt Napoleon Murphy Brock by showing him a lewd dance and suggesting that he’d smoke a high-school diploma… [Napoleon:] Hey! What you… what you… ? Wait a minute! [Jeff:] Hey this, this stuff… [Napoleon:] I’ve never seen one of these before… that’s not a menu? [Jeff:] This stuff is expensive [Napoleon:] What is that? [Jeff:] You shoot it, you’ll conserve all winter [Napoleon:] I do what? [Jeff:] It last longer [FZ:] Not only do you get the Desenex burger [Napoleon:] No… no… [Jeff:] Now come on, try it [Napoleon:] No, no, no [Jeff:] It’s really good [Napoleon:] No… Smoke THAT?! [Jeff:] Have I ever lied to you? Have I ever seen you before? [Napoleon:] I don’t, I don’t even know you! [Jeff:] Look… [Napoleon:] I don’t even know what that is! [Jeff:] Just bef… [Napoleon:] And you’re tellin’ me to smoke it?! [Jeff:] Just before, we smoked the tapes that you made [Napoleon:] Smoked the tapes? [Jeff:] Smoked the tapes of your group [Napoleon:] I think I’d rather dance [Jeff:] You can really get off! Let’s try a joint of this [Napoleon:] A WHAT?! [Jeff:] A joint! [Napoleon:] You mean this kinda joint? [Jeff:] No, man! Where you been in livin’? Reseda? [Napoleon:] No, San Jose [FZ:] The evil dope pusher is cutting up a white gym sock, formerly owned by Carl Zappa and still damp. The shredded sock will be placed inside of a high-school diploma And ignited with a sulphur preparation… [Napoleon:] Wait a minute… [FZ:] His first taste of big city life [Napoleon:] That’s okay, wait a minute… wait… (DUMMY UP… ) [Jeff:] Hey! The roach of this is really gonna be good, so I’ll save it…
[FZ:] Have mercy! [George:] Awright… awright…
[Napoleon:] What d’you do with that thing? What do you do with that thing that you have? Wait a minute Wait a minute Wait a minute What do you do With that thing? I wanna know
[Napoleon:] Wait a minute [FZ:] Now the next step of this operation Napoleon: Wait a minute! [FZ:] The evil corrupter of youth is going to take him from Step One, which is a mere high-school diploma stuffed with a gym sock, to Step Two, which is a college-degree stuffed with absolutely nothing at all. Smoke that and it’ll really get you out there!
[Napoleon:] I still don’t feel as good as I felt this mornin’… yeah yeah…
[FZ:] You’ll grow out of it…
[Jeff:] DUMMY UP!
[Napoleon:] I heard it again, somebody said…
[Jeff:] You see this?
[Napoleon:] What d’you mean? College!
[FZ:] College!
[Jeff:] That’s college-rhythm
[Napoleon:] You mean if I smoke that It’s the same as if… As if I was at college? Roll it over up! Roll it over up! Roll it over up! Gimme a…
[FZ:] No no, the college-degree is stuffed with absolutely nothing at all, you get… you get nothing with your college-degree…
[Napoleon:] Oh… But that’s what I want
[FZ:]… I forgot, I’m sorry
[Napoleon:] Well, You get nothin’, But that’s what I want
[FZ:] A true Zen saying: Nothing is what I want… The results of a higher education!