I don’t want to say sorry for leaving and hurting you ‘Cause it’s never just sorry, it’s conflict passing as truth I’m tired of going out dancing and smoking ’til my lips are blue
I’m getting high to hide the lows It’s what I do when I’m alone
Now I stand by the mirror and my fingers are shaking Lights that flicker in darkness They show me I’m changing And there’s a kind of elation When my heart starts racing
I’m getting high to hide the lows It’s what I do when I’m alone
Feel like I haven’t come home yet But I convince myself It’s just temporary heartache
Say ‘I’m doing fine’ But you can tell I can’t help but dwell
Now watch me, on the ceiling, as my body floats And my head’s underwater, with seaweed around my throat
But then I double down heaving I will always leave when I can tell I’m ’bout to blow
I’m getting high to hide the lows It’s what I do when I’m alone
Feel like I haven’t come home yet But I convince myself It’s just temporary heartache
Say ‘I’m doing fine’ But you can tell I can’t help but dwell
Eyes are closed, it’s hard to see I loved when you held onto me But I forgot just how to breathe Your touch is just a memory This different person, jagged smile That loved and lost and over time Had dwindled to a dwelling sigh And now I wonder who am I?
Feel like I haven’t come home yet But I convince myself It’s just temporary heartache
Say ‘I’m doing fine’ But you can tell I can’t help but dwell