Sy Borg – Frank Zappa

[Act II]

[SCENE ELEVEN]
[SY BORG]

[JOE:]
Sy Borg
Gimme dat, gimme dat
Sy Borg
Gimme dat, give me de chromium leg,
I beg
Sy Borg
Gimme dat, gimme dat
Sy Borg
Gimme dat, give me de chromium leg,
Little wires, pliers, tires
They turn me on
Maybe I’m crazy
Maybe I’m cra/y
Maybe I m crazy,
mon…

Stroking several of SY’s gleaming appendages JOE continues…

Gee, Sy
This is a real groovy apartment
You’ve got here

[SY BORG:]
All government sponsored recreational services are clean and efficient

[JOE:]
This is exciting
I never plooked
A tiny chrome-plated machine
That looks like a magical pig
With marital aids stuck all over it
Such as yourself before

[SY BORG:]
You’ll love it!
Its a way of life.

[JOE:]
Does that mean maybe later
You’ll plook me….

[SY BORG:]
If you wish, we may have a groovy orgy

[JOE:]
Just me and yon?

[SY BORG:]
I share this apartment
With a modified
Gay Bob doll
He goes all the way…
Ever try oral sex with a miniature rubberized homo-replica?

[JOE:]
No, ah, not yet,
Ah, is this him?

[CENTRAL SCRUTINIZED]
This is him.
Your wish is his command
He likes you
He wants to kiss you always
Just tell him what you want

[JOE:]
Really?
Hi, little guy
Think I might get a tiny, but exciting
Blow.. .job…
Gimme dat, gimme dat
Blow job…
Gimme dat, give me de chromium cob.

[SY BORG:]
Bend over.

[JOE:]
Gay Bob
Blow job
Gimme dat, gimme dat
Blow job
Gimme dat, give me de chromium cob

[SY BORG:]
You’ll love it!
It looks just like a TeleFunken U-47.

[JOE:]
Little leather cap and trousers
They look so gay..
Warren just bought some
Warren just bought some
Warren just bought some
Hey…

[SY BORG:]
Bob is tired.
Plook me now,
You savage rascal
Ehhh!
That tickles.
You are a fun person
I like you.
I want to kiss you always.

[JOE:]
Gee, this is great
Hows about some bondage and humiliation

[SY BORG:]
Anything you say, master.

[JOE:]
Oh no, I don’t believe it
You’re way more fun than Mary…

[SY BORG:]
You’re plooking too hard…

[JOE:]
And cleaner than Lucille…

[SY BORG:]
Plooking on me…

[JOE:]
What have I been missing
All these years?

[SY BORG:]
Too hard

[JOE:]
Sy…

[SY BORG:]
Too hard

[JOE:]
Sy…

[SY BORG:]
Plooking too hard on me-e-e-e-e…

[JOE:]
Speak to me
Oh no…
The golden shower must have shorted out
His master circuit
He’s, he’s, oh my God
I must have plooked him…
Hey
To death…
Hey

[CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER:]
This is the CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER…You have just destroyed
one model XOJ-37 Nuclear Powered Pan-Sexual Roto-Plooker.
And you’re gonna have to pay for it! So give up, you haven’t
got a chance.

[JOE:]
But I…
I, I, I, I…
I can’t pay
I gave all my money
To some kinda groovy religious guy…
Two songs ago…

[CENTRAL SCRUTINIZER:]
Come on out son…
Between the two of us
We’ll find a way to
Work it out